It has been a long long time since i last blogged. The only reason why there wasn't any new post was not because there wasn't anything to post, but rather, things aren't really going to well for me for the past 2 to 3 weeks. And i guess thats the reason for me not having the mood to blog.

I think i was really kinda suay for the past 3 weeks or so. Having to know that i've been posted to Armour as a recce at the end of the block leave wasn't such a good thing. I cant exactly say that training is tough. Neither can i say that it wasn't tough. All i can conclude after the first week there was that i wasn't suitable for that vocation. And thats exactly why i have been emo-ing for the whole of my first week there. And it really feels bad when there's nobody who will/can understand what i am going through. At times i really hope that someone will be there to listen to all my complains, or rather just listen to how i really feel and perhaps give me advice, but then again, its hard for people to really understand how i really feels and its even tougher for me to "open up" completely.

I just hope that things will end up well and everything will end SOON and in the way that i wanted it to be. I'm praying hard...

In case you are wandering why i say training was not exactly tough and not exactly un-tough, this is the reason.

The tough part is having to run a total of 23++km for the first week. This includes a 10km run on thurs, followed by IPPT test on fri morning. (How can someone perform at his optimum after the 10km run? but then again, my 2.4 timing improved by a tiny little bit.) The not so tough part is that we do get enough time for us to rest and wash up etc etc.

But then, i must still say that this vocation isn't suitable for me. And i have no reasons why was i selected (or rather dragged) into this S**T. Well, certain things i shall not reveal here..

How i wish the bike course can last longer. And yes, I'm currently learning how to ride a motocycle in Army. Sounds great? Not exactly though. But at least its something which i enjoy doing and the instructors there are really really good. Or at least they treat me SLIGHTLY better.. Thats what my friends told me. lol. (not true though. The instructors are good to most ppl.)


Sometimes i really wonder why I'm doing certain things/ why do i have to do certain things...